"It is not your love that sustains the marriage, but from now on, the marriage that sustains your love." (Dietrich Bonhoeffer, writing to a young bride and groom from his prison cell in Nazi Germany in 1943)
"I didn't marry you because you were perfect. I didn't even marry you because I loved you. I married you because you gave me a promise. That promise made up for your faults. And the promise I gave you made up for mine. Two imperfect people got married and it was the promise that made the marriage. And when our children were growing up, it wasn't a house that protected them; and it wasn't our love that protected them - it was that promise." (Thornton Wilder, "The Skin of Our Teeth")
"Common courtesy plays a big role in happy marriages. People who are permanently married are polite to one another. They don't want to hurt one another's feelings, and they don't try to make the other one feel humiliated. People who are married for life are extremely kind to one another." (Frank Pittman, marriage therapist)
"Marriage isn't supposed to make you happy - it's supposed to make you married. A happy marriage is a marriage between two happy people." (Frank Pittman)
"Why is it that people get married?
Because we need a witness to our lives.
There’s a billion people on the planet.
What does any one life really mean?
But in a marriage, you’re promising to care about everything…
The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things,
All of it… all the time, every day.
You’re saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it.
Your life will not go unwitnessed - because I will be your witness.'”
(Wife in the movie, "Shall We Dance?" 2004)
"When there is love in a marriage, there is harmony in the home; when there is harmony in the home, there is contentment in the community; when there is contentment in the community, there is prosperity in the nation; when there is prosperity in the nation, there is peace in the world." (Chinese proverb frequently quoted by David and Vera Mace)
"I was burned out from exhaustion, buried in the hail, poisoned in the bushes, blown out on the trail; hunted like a crocodile, ravaged in the corn, 'Come in,' she said, 'I'll give ya shelter from the storm.'" (Bob Dylan)
"I knew couples who’d been married almost forever – forty, fifty, sixty years. Seventy-two, in one case. They’d be tending each other’s illnesses, filling in each other’s faulty memories, dealing with the money troubles or the daughter’s suicide, or the grandson’s drug addiction. And I was beginning to suspect that it made no difference whether they’d married the right person. Finally, you’re just with who you’re with. You’ve signed on with her, put in a half century with her, grown to know her as well as you know yourself or even better, and she’s become the right person. Or the only person, might be more to the point. I wish someone had told me that earlier. I’d have hung on then; I swear I would.” (Anne Tyler, "A Patchwork Planet")
William Morris wrote a poem called 'Love is Enough' and someone is said to have reviewed it briefly with the words 'It isn't.' . . . , To say this is not to belittle the natural loves but to indicate where their real glory lies. It is no disparagement to a garden to say that it will not fence and weed itself, nor prune its own fruit trees, nor roll and cut its own lawns. A garden is a good thing but that is not the sort of goodness it has. It will remain a garden, as distinct from a wilderness, only if someone does all these things to it." (C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves)
"You don't marry one person; you marry three:
the person you think they are,
the person they are, and
the person they are going to become
as a result of being married to you."
(Richard Needham)
"My wife uses fabric softener. I never knew what that stuff was for. Then I noticed women coming up to me, sniffing, then saying under their breath, 'Married!' and walking away. Fabric Softeners are how our wives mark their territory. We can take off the ring, but it's hard to get that April fresh scent out of your clothes." (Andy Rooney)
"Try praising your wife, even if it does frighten her at first." (Billy Sunday)
A friend recently told us about a twenty-fifth-anniversary party where the husband gave a toast and said, "The key to our success is very simple. Within minutes after every fight, one of us says, 'I'm sorry, Sally'." (Cokie and Steve Roberts)
"If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?" (Unknown)
"A bride should pick her lingerie on whether or not it looks good on the bedpost." (Pat Brewer)
"The grass looks greener on the other side. . . but it's Astroturf." (From the report, "Does Divorce Make People Happy?")
"No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying." (Unknown)
"When people tell me they've learned from experience, I tell them the trick is to learn from other people's experience." (Warren Buffett)
"A good marriage is a contest of generosity." (Diane Sawyer)
"Choose your love, then love your choice." (Unknown)
"To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up." (Ogden Nash)
"No road is long with good company." (Turkish proverb)
"Writers say that love is concerned only with young people, and the excitement and glamor of romance end at the altar. How blind they are. The best romance is inside marriage; the finest love stories come after the wedding, not before." (Irving Stone)
"Love is seeking to act for the other person's highest good." (Jerry Cook)
A good motto for the bride and groom: "We are a work in progress with a lifetime contract." (Phyllis Koss)
"A good marriage is the union of two good forgivers." (Ruth Bell Graham)
"What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined for life - to strengthen each other in all labor, to rest on each other in all sorrow, to minister to each other in all pain, to be one with each other in silent, unspeakable memories at the moment of the last parting." (George Elliott / aka Mary Anne Evans)
"Common courtesy plays a big role in happy marriages. People who are permanently married are polite to one another. They don't want to hurt one another's feelings, and they don't try to make the other one feel humiliated. People who are married for life are extremely kind to one another." (Frank Pittman, marriage therapist)
"For most people, a life lived alone, with passing strangers or passing lovers, is incoherent and ultimately unbearable. Someone must be there to know what we have done for those we love." (Frank Pittman)
"Marriage isn't supposed to make you happy - it's supposed to make you married. A happy marriage is a marriage between two happy people." (Frank Pittman)
"Why is it that people get married?
Because we need a witness to our lives.
There’s a billion people on the planet.
What does any one life really mean?
But in a marriage, you’re promising to care about everything…
The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things,
All of it… all the time, every day.
You’re saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it.
Your life will not go unwitnessed - because I will be your witness.'”
(Wife in the movie, "Shall We Dance?" 2004)
"When there is love in a marriage, there is harmony in the home; when there is harmony in the home, there is contentment in the community; when there is contentment in the community, there is prosperity in the nation; when there is prosperity in the nation, there is peace in the world." (Chinese proverb frequently quoted by David and Vera Mace)
"I was burned out from exhaustion, buried in the hail, poisoned in the bushes, blown out on the trail; hunted like a crocodile, ravaged in the corn, 'Come in,' she said, 'I'll give ya shelter from the storm.'" (Bob Dylan)
"I knew couples who’d been married almost forever – forty, fifty, sixty years. Seventy-two, in one case. They’d be tending each other’s illnesses, filling in each other’s faulty memories, dealing with the money troubles or the daughter’s suicide, or the grandson’s drug addiction. And I was beginning to suspect that it made no difference whether they’d married the right person. Finally, you’re just with who you’re with. You’ve signed on with her, put in a half century with her, grown to know her as well as you know yourself or even better, and she’s become the right person. Or the only person, might be more to the point. I wish someone had told me that earlier. I’d have hung on then; I swear I would.” (Anne Tyler, "A Patchwork Planet")
William Morris wrote a poem called 'Love is Enough' and someone is said to have reviewed it briefly with the words 'It isn't.' . . . , To say this is not to belittle the natural loves but to indicate where their real glory lies. It is no disparagement to a garden to say that it will not fence and weed itself, nor prune its own fruit trees, nor roll and cut its own lawns. A garden is a good thing but that is not the sort of goodness it has. It will remain a garden, as distinct from a wilderness, only if someone does all these things to it." (C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves)
"You don't marry one person; you marry three:
the person you think they are,
the person they are, and
the person they are going to become
as a result of being married to you."
(Richard Needham)
"My wife uses fabric softener. I never knew what that stuff was for. Then I noticed women coming up to me, sniffing, then saying under their breath, 'Married!' and walking away. Fabric Softeners are how our wives mark their territory. We can take off the ring, but it's hard to get that April fresh scent out of your clothes." (Andy Rooney)
"Try praising your wife, even if it does frighten her at first." (Billy Sunday)
A friend recently told us about a twenty-fifth-anniversary party where the husband gave a toast and said, "The key to our success is very simple. Within minutes after every fight, one of us says, 'I'm sorry, Sally'." (Cokie and Steve Roberts)
"If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?" (Unknown)
"A bride should pick her lingerie on whether or not it looks good on the bedpost." (Pat Brewer)
"The grass looks greener on the other side. . . but it's Astroturf." (From the report, "Does Divorce Make People Happy?")
"No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying." (Unknown)
"When people tell me they've learned from experience, I tell them the trick is to learn from other people's experience." (Warren Buffett)
"A good marriage is a contest of generosity." (Diane Sawyer)
"Choose your love, then love your choice." (Unknown)
"To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up." (Ogden Nash)
"No road is long with good company." (Turkish proverb)
"Writers say that love is concerned only with young people, and the excitement and glamor of romance end at the altar. How blind they are. The best romance is inside marriage; the finest love stories come after the wedding, not before." (Irving Stone)
"Love is seeking to act for the other person's highest good." (Jerry Cook)
A good motto for the bride and groom: "We are a work in progress with a lifetime contract." (Phyllis Koss)
Comments
That's good advice for dealing with women in general, not just your wife. :)